well hello there ...
These Days I'm Happy
Tuesday, Apr. 26, 2005
9:29 AM

These days ...

These days my life is much more different than one year ago. I never would have thought that I would be okay being a stay at home wife, but I am. It takes a LOT of getting used to, but now that I am, I LOVE IT! Right now my days are filled with keeping the house sparkling in the event that someone might want to see it (I told you we're selling it right?).

Brad got me a sewing machine for Christmas and that is my new passion. I've actually started working on a quilt. It is a lot of fun and I get to create things again. I think that is one of the things I really miss about my old job. I mean I've got the business and hopefully after all this buying/selling/moving stuff is done I can refocus on that, but actually creating something that I WANT and not what someone else is paying me to create for them. Well, it's different and much more satisfying.

There was also this sense of guilt/shame that I had to work through. I know now that it comes from the fact that I've always supported myself. I had my first job at 13 and from then on, if I wanted something I worked for it. There is a real sense of defeat when you go from making, well let's just say a GOOD amount of money, to only making money on a sporatic freelance basis.

For a long time I felt like I wasn't pulling my weight in our marriage. Brad NEVER felt that way, but I did and it really got to me. Finally I sat down and explained to him my feelings and how I was looking forward to staying home now, especially since we are about to start the adoption process. I just told him that I wanted to be able to stay home when we finally start a family. And, of course, he was totally on board. He said that if I could work it out for us financially (I keep our books) then he would love nothing more than for me to stay home if that's what made me happy. He is great! I couldn't have been blessed with a better husband, he is just the greatest guy I've ever known.

As much as I'm a bundle of nerves about selling the house and moving up into the city; I'm also really excited and anxious! The prospect of finding a home that needs a little updating is exciting. There is one that we've put an offer on that I really hope we get. It's in an area called Heritage Hills East and it is amazing! The location is great and it needs just the right amount of renovation. We would get to redo the wood floors and update the kitchen and bathroom. Now if we can just be lucky this time!

Oh well, if it's meant to be it will happen.

Well, I should go start the dishwasher and get some laundry going.

Till later,
Squeeky

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Song of the Day: ��These Days - Nico
Socks of the Day: ��red flip-flops
Smell of the Day: ��freshly mown grass
Last Five Entries:

New Ramblings - Wednesday, Dec. 16, 2009
return of the squee - Tuesday, Dec. 15, 2009
Movin' on up! - Thursday, Oct. 05, 2006
Our Life These Days - Tuesday, May. 30, 2006
Downtown OKC and his urge to take a whiz - Sunday, Jan. 22, 2006