I LOVE DOTS!!! (and here is why)

In case that isn't enough info about the party for ya, let me give you my version!

So I spend all day with my mom, picking out and ordering flowers; finding just the right kind of ribbon; etc., etc. So by 6:45 pm I am headed home into the loving arms of Fu for a short rest before I head out again for dinner and the MAIN EVENT (aka my bachelorette party). I arrive at The Mont at 9:10 on the dot to find just about every friend I have waiting anxiously for my arrival. I have to tell you that it was one of the most wonderful sights any human could every wish for - all your best girlfriends in one room because they want to wish you well - OR maybe they were just there to give me penii paraphernalia - Whichever! Anyhoo - they were all having the first of many drinks they would consume throughout the evening and were MORE than eager for me to order a drink. Unfortunately I had succumb to a terrible migraine headache that day and was currently under the influence of a Lortab - SO I could NOT drink any alcohol. But don't feel bad for me because I had a blast just watching everyone have such a good time. So I ordered a water and the waitress brings it out in the BIGGEST PENIS CUP my eyes have every seen! It was hysterical!! The weird thing about it was that it kind of had a crazy straw that looped all around and inside it - it was BIZARRE and VEINY! haha Truly, Dots went all out for this thing!

Next they had me open all the nasty little gifts they had purchased - some made me laugh, some made blush, and some made me question my morality.

Sometime around 10:30 "Dr. Love" showed up to display his "where's" (as in "where is his underwear?"). I was really embarrassed at first, but then people started coming over from other tables and handing me ones to stick in his g-string, so I realized that everyone was LOVING this and I should just relax. But you know... then I just couldn't figure out where to look ... Do I look him in the face? Do I look at the other girls? Do I look at his "package"? I mean you tell me, what would you do? Yep, that's what I thought! So that is what I did, I just kept focusing on the one dollar bills in my hand and asking everyone around me when I was supposed to start "tipping" the man. Unfortunately everyone was focused on him and not answering my question. Oh well, it's kind of like riding a bike - you just kind of watch other people and figure it out on your own. (sorry that was the best analogy I could come up with)

Anyway the evening was AMAZING and Dots was the perfect hostess!!

Smackin' that Ass!
Squeeky